Love is.....

 Note to readers: I don't know how often I will write but I've been feeling the need to write and get my thoughts onto paper - real paper and the digital kind.  So, read, share, agree, disagree as you will but I will likely continue writing and yet I don't know how regularly I will post.
  Several months ago I was asked to give a talk in church on love.  It was a topic I had and continue to think about because it is so important in this life.  Here is my resulting talk.  I hope you enjoy it.  Feel free to leave your thoughts, although I do appreciate respectful comments pro or con.  Many thanks for reading.
 

   What do sunrises, kissing, the laughter of children, holding hands, ice cream, and the Red Sox all have in common?  People say that they love seeing, doing, hearing, feeling, eating and watching them!  The word LOVE in the English language can mean so many things.  We describe our feelings for our parents, our jobs, a boyfriend or girlfriend and a sports team with the same word – but does it mean the same thing? (for Red Sox fans…. It just might…..)? 

            I want to touch on several aspects of LOVE: romantic love, love of neighbor, and love of God.

            I’ll talk about romantic love first because it’s tricky and conditional.  Romantic love is an A-mazing feeling, right?!  Who doesn’t love the tingling stomach, the weak in the knees feeling for that gorgeous someone!? It’s essential in marriage and important in dating – important to recognize that you feel it for someone.  However – and this is a BIG however – it shouldn’t be fully employed until marriage.  Period.  Try building a house with only nails – literally nails.  And only nails.  It would be one ugly and useless house.  That would be like trying to build a relationship out of romantic love alone.  It won’t last and it’s not useful or fulfilling in the long run.  Don’t get me wrong – to make a marriage work you need mutual romantic love – but you must have more.

            The more is what I want to cover in the rest of my talk.  The more are the other parts of love – love of neighbor and love of God.  In the Old testament the Lord instructed the Israelites to “love thy neighbor as thyself” (Leviticus 19:18) and “love the lord thy God with all they heart” (Deuteronomy 6:5).  He reiterated their importance when he fulfilled the Mosaic law but still held those two teachings as the most important commandments of all. 

            Loving our neighbor and loving God is what makes up most of our waking hours.  Every interaction we have – including with ourselves - is done with some form of love or non-love.  There is no neutral in this.  “Karen,” you may say “that is ridiculous.  How do I show love with strangers or irritating co-workers, or even myself.” Here is how: every waking moment we choose.  We choose how and why to act, speak or think a certain way.  Will we do it from a basis of love or from some other motive?  According to Heavenly Father love should be the basis of our actions towards everyone.  Think of that, will you.  How would our lives change if everything we did was based on demonstrating sincere love for another and for God.  Not fear of failure, not self-interest, not fatigue, not retribution, not disinterest but real love for someone else. 

            Sometimes I think we are afraid to say “I love you”.  Why?  What is wrong with telling someone you want them to be happy.  Isn’t that what love is – a way of saying to someone “I want you to be happy and I will do what I am able to do to help you be happy”.  Perhaps a way to make that phrase more palatable is to recognize the other names we give to love: friendship, service, charity, kindness, joy, patience, hope, endurance, stillness, beauty, effort, sacrifice, and many others.

            Elder Marvin J. Ashton in his October 1975 General Conference talk entitled “Love Takes Time” shared this about love of neighbor and of God, “We must at regular and appropriate intervals speak and reassure others of our love and the long time it takes to prove it by our actions. Real love does take time. The Great Shepherd had the same thoughts in mind when he taught, “If ye love me, keep my commandments” (John 14:15; italics added) and “If ye love me feed my sheep” (John 21:16; italics added). Love demands action if it is to be continuing. Love is a process. Love is not a declaration. Love is not an announcement. Love is not a passing fancy. Love is not an expediency. Love is not a convenience. “If ye love me, keep my commandments” and “If ye love me feed my sheep” are God-given proclamations that should remind us we can often best show our love through the processes of feeding and keeping.

            “Undoubtedly our Heavenly Father tires of expressions of love in words only. He has made it clear through his prophets and his word that his ways are ways of commitment, and not conversation. He prefers performance over lip service. We show our true love for him in proportion to our keeping his words and the processes of feeding.”

            Several weeks ago when I began preparing for this talk I made a list of things that in my mind illustrate love either from God or from people to each other.  Here they are:           

·      Love is the sweet peace that comes when you have repented and you feel that God has forgiven you.

·      Love is a gentle kiss.

·      It is laughter before bedtime.

·      Love is tickling a baby to see her smile or hear him giggle.

·      It is a sunrise.

·      It is a smile between two friends.

·      Love is forgiveness to one who has hurt or offended you.

·      It is looking for reasons to talk, text or call someone.

·      Love is seeking ways to make another happy.

·      Love is friends.

·      It is caring more about another’s feelings and needs than your own.

·      It is recognizing that the more you give of it – the more you receive in return.

·      Love does not put self-interest first.

·      Love is sunshine.

·      Love is a choice that must be made daily, hourly, and sometimes in every moment.

·      It is like faith in that it must be nourished or it will dwindle and die.

·      Love is strong – when cultivated and strengthened it will never break.

·      Love and faith are the building blocks of God, true religion and believers – without both God could not be.

·      Love is why we believe in Christ.

·      It is why the earth is beautiful.

·      Love is a commandment.

·      Love is why we are on the earth.

·      It is why we have the Atonement.

·      Love is the greatest treasure.

·      Love is sweeter than sugar, softer than down, and stronger than any building material.

·      It is as necessary for growth and progression as oxygen is for life.

·      Love is not terrifying – the thought of losing it is what terrifies and stops us from seeking and giving love to others.

·      Love can be painful but pain helps us know we love.

·      Love will not fade with time – it grows stronger, deeper, richer, sweeter and better with time and effort.

·      It is working to communicate every day.

·      Love is not giving up.

·      Love is not effortless.

·      Love is not easy.

·      Love comes in levels.

·      Love is commitment.

            In closing, I’d like to tell you from my personal experience of being divorced to not let fear of rejection or divorce stop you from trying, getting up, dusting yourself off and trying again.  Divorce does not mean you are a failure.  Nor does breaking up.  The true failure comes in giving up or not trying in the first place.

A Part of My Heart....

A week ago in church my bishop (similar to a minister or preacher) spoke.  It was his last Sunday as our bishop as he was asked to serve in a different church position (in my church we have a lay or unpaid ministry - people serve voluntarily in many different positions over their lifetimes).  He wanted to leave us with some words of wisdom - to share a few of the things that are most important to him.  I will preface this retelling by saying my congregation is made up exclusively by single adults and we attend this congregation by choice for many different reasons including the hope of finding a spouse, making friends and/or joining with others who have a similar life situation.  His words were so touching to me that I wanted to share them with others along with some of my own thoughts.

He spoke on two main topics (or at least this is what stood out to me): choice and marriage.  In the most straightforward of ways he said, "You choose who you want to be.  You choose your life.  Be the person you want to be.  No one, no thing, and no situation determines your life and your choices.  You choose who you want to be.
  "You choose who you want to love and who you want to be with.  People wonder how in a dating situation, one person can feel they've received an answer from God saying, 'Yes! This is the right person to marry!' while the other party in the relationship feels they have received just the opposite direction from God, 'No! This is not the person to marry.'  Will God tell people opposite things?  No.  The simple truth is we interpret what God tells us and we make a choice and then look for reasons or signs to support our choice."

His words gave me pause and I reflected on my own relationships.  How have I interpreted God's messages to me?  When another person is involved you sometimes have to live by their choices regardless of how you feel moved to act.  The difficult part is learning how to live joyfully and to continue in faith when things don't work out as you hoped, thought, planned and prayed.

On the subject of marriage he said, "I have been married 36 years.  If you would have asked me 36 years ago if I would help you quilt or would be interested in attending a quilt show I would have told you no, emphatically.  Quilting wasn't even listed on my top 100 things I'd want to do.  Yet, today, I have crossed the country and spent hours at quilting shops and shows.  I've walked up to quilting displays and said, 'My, look how those points match up.  They're almost as good as mine!' Why?  I have learned to love quilting because the person I love loves to quilt.  There is no better place to learn how to be selfless and to learn about selflessness than in marriage."

Several years ago, in a combined men and women's church meeting we were discussing marriage.  At that time I had been divorced for maybe 2 years.  I raised my hand to share some thoughts on the subject from my own viewpoint.  I felt the spirit of God confirming the words I shared and had many people - from the congregation and from the local and stake leadership - approach me and thank me for my comments.  I share that with you not in hopes of sounding oh so special and spiritual but because I have felt from the moment I got married, through my divorce and up to this very day how important, beautiful, and sacred is marriage.  As a child I remember making everything into a family, I would fashion a family out of clay - a mom, dad, and kids.  Even the dinner table was not spared as the knife was the dad, the spoon was mom, and the fork was a child.  Everything represented family to me.  And, still does.  I get so excited when I see two people dating - and I hope and pray for the success of their dating.  I mourn for the divorces of friends and strangers. 

My biggest fear was that I would get divorced.  Well, I have lived through and survived my biggest fear.  And it was brutal.  The one thing I had always wanted - hoped and prayed for - a best friend to marry and with whom I could create a family - slipped away.  And though I was devastated I never lost my firm unwavering belief in the truthfulness and beauty and sacredness of marriage.

Here are my own thoughts on choice and marriage:

I heard the story of a group of 19-21 year old missionaries who were traveling in a car with an apostle of the Lord.  They thought to pick his brain and get some advice on how to find a spouse when they returned from their missions.  Upon asking the apostle how they would know when they found "the right one", he said, "You will find your answer in Doctrine & Covenants 88:40."  The missionaries quickly looked up the scripture, which says:  For intelligence cleaveth unto intelligence; wisdom receiveth widom; truth embraceth truth; virtue loveth virtue; light cleaveth unto light; mercy hath compassion on mercy and claimeth her own; justice continueth its course and claimeth its own; judgement goeth before the face of him who sitteth upon the throne and governeth and executeth all things.
The apostle explained how the scripture would help the missionaries to find a spouse by saying, "You will attract who you are.  If you wish to marry someone intelligent - become intelligent.  If you wish to marry someone truthful or wise then become those things.  Become the person you wish to marry for that is who you will attract."

Marriage can be so sweet.  There is nothing quite like locking the door at night knowing you are at home with the person you love more than anyone else in the world.  Laughing at inside jokes, notes left on dressers or washing machines expressing sentimental trivialities or love.  Holding hands while watching television.  Goofy date nights.  It is learning how to make room for two lives where before there was just one. It is creating memories for future retelling and reliving.  It is finding the best in the other person and trusting that they are finding the best in you.  It is believing in someone's true potential while enjoying who they are at that moment.  Marriage is all about choice.  It is choosing to be with someone and then making that same choice each an every moment of every day for the rest of your life.  That sounds daunting and if we focus on the difficulty we lose out on the miracle of putting someone else first and realizing that in doing that we have actually made our own lives happier, better, and more enjoyable.  Marriage is hard work.  It is tears, it is aching hearts, it is struggle, it is sacrifice, it is giving up what we thought we wanted for what God wants for us.  It is realizing that what God wants for us is really what we wanted all along.  

I want to marry again.  I am not ashamed to say that and to work for it and hope for it and pray for it.  There is no fear great enough to persuade me to give up that hope.  I am grateful to a wise Father in Heaven who somehow helped me to see and feel this truth even when my own marriage died.  It is worth the struggle and sacrifice.

Take a chance......

On Saturday night I had dinner with a small group of friends - or soon to be friend in the case of one of the individuals.  After a conversation about the good and the bad of having expectations towards others he suggested I watch a TED talk video by Brene Brown called The Power of Vulnerability.

Tonight I watched the video.  It was eye opening, perhaps because I could see the truth of her words in my own life.  She posits that vulnerability is the birthplace of joy, happiness, and all good things.  She also says, that to avoid being vulnerable we numb ourselves to the pain.  The only problem is when we numb the pain we also numb the joy.  Watch the video and tell me what you think!  Is it true in your life??

and to be a friend.... Part 1.

Happy Gorgeous Fall Day!!!

I have some thoughts I wanted to write down and share.

Last Sunday I was waiting outside my bishop's office (a bishop is similar to a pastor or a priest)

for a quick meeting.  While I was waiting I was chatting with some fellow ward members 

(a ward means the same as congregation).

I asked the question, "Hey how do people make friends?  I think I've forgotten how."

After a little bit of laughter one guy asked, "What do you mean you've forgotten!?"

"Well" I said, "If I'm going to be completely honest, I think that I've spent so much time thinking about dating and getting married and making sure I'm doing everything I think I'm supposed to do that I've forgotten how to just be friends with someone."

There was a split second when I worried that I had divulged my weakness to an unforgiving audience

and then one of my male friends spoke up, "I completely understand what you mean.  Guys are under a lot of pressure.  There's a lot of feeling guilty.  We know we should be dating and getting married but how do we get to know the girls?  The only time we have is on Sundays for three hours at church and then maybe at a few other activities scattered here and there.  So the pressure is on at church to make a good impression, but then you worry that you are not being your true self.  And everyone is in the same boat.  We are all trying to find someone but the stress is huge and becoming friends seems to fall by the wayside." 

It was very interesting to hear this from him.  From the outside he is a guy that has everything going for him.  He seems very self assured without being arrogant.  He could have his pick of amazing women as he is a truly amazing man.  And yet, to hear that he (and other men from his explanation) feel just as stressed out, scared and frustrated as my female friends and I do was interesting and alarming.  

How do men and women expect to get to know each other authentically 

when both sides are laden with stress, guilt and fear?

 

bestest story teller ever!!!!!

I grew up listening to Public Radio,

 specifically on the children's radio program

The Pea Green Boat.

I was introduced to all sorts of 

wonderful singers and storytellers for children.

Bill Harley 

is one of my favorites.

(he's from Rhode Island - here's his website

http://www.billharley.com/default.asp)

Here's a video of one of his well known song/stories:

You're Not The Boss of Me

(I'm totally bragging right now.... when I was teaching at a

Spanish school in MT he came to visit and gave us a private show 

- it was awesome - 

he was friends with some of the parents whose kids went to the school.

It's nice to have connections.)

You can buy his stuff on iTunes or through his website

P.S. if you want to laugh out loud 

I highly suggest listening to the following:

Dad Threw the TV Out the Window

Black Socks 

(for those who hate to do laundry)

50 Ways to Fool Your Mother

Zanzibar (not on iTunes)

Wheezy and the Moon Pies

(seriously my favorite one but not on iTunes)

 

and for my birthday....

I will celebrate my 35th year of being alive on 

Tuesday June 19th.

I love birthdays.

To me, they signify all that a person has survived;

a trophy of another year of laughter, tears, and all the experiences of life.

My sister recently wrote and asked, "What do you want for your birthday?"

My reply:

1. My student loans paid off

2. To see Wicked on Broadway in NYC

3. To understand men

4. Dinner at Salem Cross Inn

5. An updated wardrobe

For some reason, she didn't find my list the least bit helpful.

I think I'd like to add the following:

6. A Cuisinart food processor

7. An eraser for heart-ache

8. A Le Creuset stock pot/casserole pan

9. My little Sergio back

10. A kayak

To be honest, I don't need anything.

I have wonderful friends, a loving family, safety, health, a good job, a reliable car,

wonderful landlords, amazingly beautiful memories 

(as exemplified in photos of last years birthday bash above and below),

hope, knowledge of a loving God, and faith in a future

where I will be married to my best friend and have several lovely chubby babies!

I don't need anything.....

but flowers and chocolates will never be turned down!

Here kitty kitty...

(Homer the blind wonder cat.  Thanks to http://www.gwencooper.com/ for use of this photo.)

I love cats.  I grew up with cats.  I am also severely allergic to cats.  I may never live in a home with a cat again, but I can certainly appreciate all that there is to love about these little beasts.  I think I relate to the cat.... independent, seeks snuggling and affection, speaks up loudly when there is disagreement, and rejoices in a good spot of sun in which to lazily lay napping.

I am in the middle of reading a wonderful book called Homer's Odyssey by Gwen Cooper about her life with a blind but certainly not handicapped black cat named Homer.  The book is about Homer's unquenchable zest for living and adventure.  As the reader goes through the daily exploits of this exuberant feline we grow with the author as she traverses through the most common of human occurrences.  The story is really how one woman is taught how to embrace life from her sightless cat who doesn't realize that his blindness is supposed to be a disadvantage!

Wouldn't life be amazing for each of us if we approached the trials and downs of life with the same type of blindness!? Here is a paragraph from the book that illustrates what I mean:

"It was Homer's confidence that, in my most disheartened moments, also made me feel the most ashamed of myself.  Wasn't Homer the cat who wasn't supposed to be able to do anything?  To meet new challenges or be independent?  Wasn't he the one who'd inspired me once with his willingness to climb as high as he could without knowing exactly how high he was going or how he would get back down?  Every leap Homer took was a leap of faith.  Homer was living proof of the adage that fortune favors the brave, that just because you couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel didn't mean it wasn't there." (Homer's Odyssey, pp. 104)

So, a challenge to each of us - to let go of the fear and leap with faith.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Kiss and Make Up Day

I've been on a little hiatus from blogging...

However, I couldn't pass up the opportunity to

share today's special holiday!!

Kiss and Make Up Day

For all of you (okay, us) who have offended

or been offended by someone

let's take today and make it better.

Whether it's a tiny spat

or a huge mess

today's the day to get over it and

make up.

If the person lives far a way a good kiss

substitute are flowers, phone calls

even emails and text messages work.

If you do end up stopping a long standing feud

or receiving a gushingly sweet "I'm sorry!"

post your story in the comments!

Graduation and Family Time!!

Though I finished school in December I walked

for graduation in May.

Graduation itself was, well, dull and boring.

But, I'd do it a hundred times over again

if it meant my family would come to visit me again!

We visited all sorts of places as you'll see below.

This picture requires some explanation, as you may have noticed

my father seems to be losing his teeth.

Rightly so, he's got some false ones in while his upper

jaw heals before he gets his permanent ones put it.

They are a bit loose and if he smiles too big

or opens his mouth too wide they sometimes.... slip.

Dad decided we needed a shot with his classy teeth falling out.

I laughed sooooo much while my parents and my brother

were around. It sure felt nice to have them there!!

Mom, Dad, Rich on a Cape Cod beach - it was

incredibly foggy. So dense that

as you walked through it you could feel

the droplets forming on you.

Here I am all decked out at graduation.

This one is for Jessica, we are in Mount Auburn Cemetery

on top of the Washington tower (aka. Rapunzel's Tower).

My favorite shot. All of us aboard the Mayflower II.

When can they come back for another visit!!??

Finished!!!!!!! My bedspread quilt is done!!!

It's been a year since I first started this project

and now it's done!

It feels soooooo good to sleep under it.

It's the perfect weight and keeps me warm

without being too hot!

I've always loved sleeping

but now

it's harder then ever to get out of bed.

Here's the backside of my quilt

(it could be the front too)!

Here's the front side already in use on my bed!

Here's a close up of the binding - yes I did it by hand!

Thanks to my fabulous quilting instructor, Nancy!

Sad or not sad that is the question...

Dear Readers,

One of my conscientious readers was

appalled at the "waste of latex and water"

shown in the video of "You Make Me Smile",

which I posted a day or two ago.

Do you agree with this anonymous sir or madame?

(Feel free to read his or her comment beneath the last post.)

Is it a "waste-fest" as this person claimed? Or is it making

creative use of resources to provide

joy and entertainment with little

harm to anyone?

Thoughts, please.

Kyle Andrews "You Always Make Me Smile" Official Video

Let's get ready for Spring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(GO BYU!!!)

Christmas & the New Year

It was so nice to be home in MT.

This is one of my favorite views of Missoula.

One of my resolutions for this year:

Take more pictures of people I love.

I didn't get very many during the break.

Shame on me.

Here's one of my mom holding a table runner I made.

The pattern said it was a 10-minute table runner.

Turned out to be more like a 40-minute table runner,

but still not bad.

Finished.

HALLELUJAH!!!!

I am done with my master's program.

Now, off to sleep for a few days....

Gift Idea: King Singers

This one is a gift idea in memory of Nathan who sang this for the Mr. 91st ward pageant!! Anyone remember that splendid event :-)?

On a serious note - these guys are a-mazing! If you want to have some great Christmas or anytime music look for the King Singers on iTunes - or if you're lucky maybe they'll be coming to visit a city near you!!

A gift appropriate for Sunday

Forgiveness.

One word that takes no money,

but,

it requires letting go of being right,

it requires letting go of being angry,

it requires expecting nothing in return.

It requires a lot of effort,

including prayer,

to a very willing Heavenly Father.

The gift of

forgiveness

is really a gift to three.

You.

The one you forgive.

Your Heavenly Father.

"Forgiveness is the economy of the heart...

forgiveness saves the expense of anger,

the cost of hatred,

the waste of spirits."

Hannah More

"He that cannot forgive others

breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself;

for every man has need to be forgiven."
Thomas Fuller

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/h/hannahmore129124.html#ixzz17whzSqIZ

For the Gents in your life...the Ladies as well

Looking for a nifty gift for your mister?

Check out the spiffy tie-tacks from Emersonmade.com.

They are handmade, 100% wool and linen.

Check out the gorgeous flowers for the Misses as well.

Best Socks in the World goes too.....

Today's gift idea is....

SmartWool Socks.

Don't be fooled by any other name.

Expensive? Yes.

Worth it? Most definitely.

Even if your feet sweat a lot

they won't get cold.

They won't get too hot either.

Your feet stay the "just right temperature"

in these beauties.

They are for all seasons.

You can get them for men/women/children/pets

(okay, maybe not pets)

and they come in all colors, styles, lengths and thicknesses.

I have running socks, skiing socks, ankle socks,

mid calf socks, socks for slacks, and socks for jeans.

Truly, once you go for SmartWool

you will never want anything else.

Too bad they don't make SmartWool nylons...

I *heart* SmartWool socks.

Where you can buy them:

www.amazon.com

http://www.sierratradingpost.com/

(they are on sale here! type SmartWool into the search box)

http://www.rei.com/

http://www.artisansocks.com/smartwool-socks/

(great!! selection here)

Things and 1 gift idea

Sad news first...

I did not get the library job I applied for in Missoula.

Sad or relieved...

I think I feel both.

Next,

my gift giving lists are coming few and far between

thanks to homework

(only 1 week left of school!!!

then I will be a Master....of Libraries).

So,

instead I am gong to try and post one gift idea daily.

Here's number one....

Michael Buble - Crazy Love CD

FAN-TASTIC!!

His voice could melt steel let alone butter.

It's clean, fun, romantic, and smooth!

(Some friends and I at his concert a few weeks back)

Kitchen Goodness

A compilation of some of my favorite cooking and eating related things. Enjoy!!

(again, add your own suggestions in the comments block - add a link if you can find one)

Penzey Spices - Fantastic gifts for the cooks in your life (and perhaps a little treat for yourself as well). Great for standard spices for baking and cooking but also has an extensive collection of Indian spices.

• Sunny Paris - Absolutely fantastic on scrambled eggs - wow! Works great sprinkled on roasted vegetables or in sauces too. You can't go wrong!!
• Pure Vanilla - This is real vanilla in its finest form. For those recipes that really need a quality shot of vanilla.
• Spice Gift Packs - 4-packs and 8-packs of various types of spices for any occasion and style of cooking.

Hot Chocolate

• Allegro Brand Indian Spice -available at Whole Foods Market
• Burdick's Hot Chocolate - The *Best* hot chocolate in the world - expensive, but if you love hot chocolate - utterly worth the price! Dark is incredibly strong - not for the faint of palate! White is sweet and dreamy! Milk - it's like a melted cup of milk chocolate.
• Godiva Hot Chocolate - This one wins second place for delectable hot chocolate! I prefer the dark - it's got depth without being bitter.
• Mexican Hot Chocolate Recipe - From Whole Foods Market. I love Mexican Hot Chocolate!

Candy Cane Joe-Joes - This is heavenly Christmas flavor wrapped in a cookie - and it only appears at Christmas. Crushed candy canes folded into creamy frosting layered between two chocolate cookies! If you like Oreo's you will love these so much more!

Almond Roca - Toffy nutty chocolatey goodness wrapped in a lovely golden wrapper!

Yummy Cheese - Sugarbush Farms. Incredible cheese made in VT.

Maple Syrup - real stuff! - Sugarbush Farms. Read up on the Maple Syrup grades - the syrup gets darker as the season continues.

Lake Champlain Chocolate Carmels - Truly some of the best chocolates I've ever tasted.

WilliamsSonoma - Silicone spatula - The silicone spatula is one of the best all purpose kitchen tools. It works as a stirring tool, rubber scraper, it's dishwasher safe, and delightful to use!

WilliamsSonoma - Whisk - I love this whisk!! It doesn't rust, the tines stay put and it feels great in your hand. I suggest a little gift set of whisk, spatula and hot chocolate or dish towels.

Best Kitchen Drying Towels - I've got one of these fantastic towels. They suck up the water quickly and dry your dishes in no time flat!

• Christmas Dish Towel
• Dish Towel
• Dish Towel
• Dish Towel
• Flour Sack Towels: set of three
• Dish Towel

Mini Colander - A fantastic mini colander perfect for a single serving of washed fruits and veggies!

Flirty Aprons - A friend has one of these delightfully cute aprons. Want to add a little fifties flare to your kitchen - tie one of these on for size!

Red Plate Special - A perfect gift for anyone who deserves to feel special on any day!

America's Test Kitchen Website - Are you a fan?? If not - see what the fuss is about click here and watch an episode or two!

America's Test Kitchen Cookbook - I *LOVE* this cookbook. I've used it to bake cookies, breads, salads, pie crusts, meats.... etc. You can't go wrong with this fail-safe book. Better than any other all purpose cookbook!

Mexican and Yucatecan Recipes - My mom and I took a cooking class from the man who runs Los Dos in Merida, Mexico. His recipes are fantastic if you enjoy Mexican food.